Has sex been stalled out lately near the bottom of your to-do list? Has it become something you know that you two should do more of, while it lurks in seventh place right near ‘start back at the gym’ and ‘clean hall closet?’
From what I’m hearing and feeling, the big new comeback is booking weekly ‘date night.’ I’m probably getting an eye roll from many at this very minute, but think about it. Sometimes sex might seem like work, sort of like going to exercise class. Not in the mood? How about afterwards? Damn it felt great, so glad I did it! : ) For sure, the no-excuses Friday night babysitter and date has kept my neighbor and her hubby cookin’ after two kids and thirty-plus years. Trust me!
So how to go from meh to yeah? Make it a special occasion! Doesn’t everyone love an event? Birthday parties, music concerts, dinner parties. Book it like football season for couples – make it a dedicated evening, with pre-game all the way through to the wrap up show. Set aside which day of the week is generally best and stick to schedule. Then it’s all about the anticipation and preparation.
Just think, we always plan details for vacation and then we are free for fun. We make reservations for fancy restaurants, pick a cool outfit, and we usually have an awesome time. Planning and psyching up for an activity makes it extra special.
Getting in a sensual mindset for your hubby or lover makes all the difference. Prep yourself for sex even if you are not totally sure it’s going to happen. Get a massage or mani/pedi. Eat fruit and make your juices taste sweet, if oral intimacy might happen. Leave fruit for your lover in the morning. Make your skin luscious to the touch and smelling delicious.
Maybe a self-love appointment before your date will put you in a sultry or sexed-up mood. Meditate for a clear and loving mindset or read erotica for a lusty, naughty mind. A great time is rare if you just run in from work and either of you looks tired, or like you didn’t try to make this time together special in some way.
You know why the sexually obsessed, sex positive couples, are actually the best at sex? They plan ahead. Even after years getting naked with the same person, they make love-making and naked time special in innovative ways. A favorite lover of mine always had a plan for our Friday date night. It wasn’t only his amazing libido. I’m sure that his mind, full of wild fantasies and naughty ideas, was working overtime and pre-planning to maximize the desired results. He always brought wine, his bag of tricks, and a guaranteed ‘O’ or three for both of us before our midnight bedtime.
Maybe it’s outfits or costumes, a special lotion or toy? Maybe a secret location, hotel or naughty texts pre-rendezvous? Make it happen…
Oh the thrills of appointment sex! Special treats plus the afterglow of victory and adventure.
Make your weekly date into a sexcapade. Mmmm.