Just Be Into Him

Porn star boobs not required

By Vivienne Arkell

While Lou Piaget’s book, How to be a Great Lover, awesomely illustrates hot sex techniques, there are more subtle lessons that are equally important for pleasing your partner.

Because of the way we have been conditioned socially, it might be difficult to believe, but it’s true: what men want more than anything else is simply for us to be into it.”

How often do we find ourselves dressing provocatively to attract the male gaze? In our insecurity over a few extra pounds or not having Kardashian lips or porn star boobs, do we get self-conscious?

“During an intimate encounter, a man is looking for your mind, body and soul to be into a full relationship with the project at hand. He wants to know beyond a shadow of a doubt that he turns you on, and that there is no place else in the world you’d rather be than with him, making love.”

And where are we? Worrying about if our back is arched, where our hair is on the pillow or if he likes what our mouth looks like down there? Please don’t go there with your mind. Piaget’s research suggests that “women tend to be more inhibited sexually by the appearance of their own bodies than anything else.”

“Be aware of the sensuality in everything you see, feel, touch, taste and smell. He will not only respond to your sensory awakening, chances are he’ll want to be part of the experience.”

Your comfort level as a sensualist, both in mind and body, is key to feeling sexually free and open to share. Your body will reflect this mood. Not by being brazen or blatant – just be in the moment and exploringly playful.

Worrying about skills or satisfying them at this point should also be way in the back of your mind. It’s naked time shared together – a willingness to enjoy your bodies, together.

“Once you’re there, the only thing that really matters about your body to them is that it expresses a willingness to thoroughly and freely enjoy the experience… men love body language. They respond to a body that is totally committed to whatever it’s doing. Whether you’re eating, playing sports, telling a story, or kissing doesn’t matter. If you’re committed, men notice.”

The Sensualogist couldn’t agree more. Your perfect partner will relish your eccentricities and passions. Food? Music? Books? Health? Arts? Stay engaged and impassioned.

“While making love with an enthusiastic partner, men don’t have the wherewithal to focus on imperfections, because they perceive what they have as perfect.”

And guess what? You will not only please your partner. You will savor the experience and be pleased yourself. 

To learn more about this book and other recommendations, visit the bookshop.


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